Hi Blog,
So I'm currently taking part in a weight loss competition at my office. It's sort of a crash diet challenge, determining which employee can successfully restrict themselves from the things that make them who they are. I'm actually really good at it. My uncanny ability to make my weight fluctuate more than other people has got me thinking, which is why I'm writing this post.
My thought revolves around trying to make a career out of things that you're good at. I heard that piece of advice from someone at some point: find out what you're really good at and try to make a living doing that. So I decided to come up with a list of things that I'm really good at:
Gaining/Losing Weight - I've proven this in big ways (losing 100+ pounds in 6 months) and in not such big ways (I think I've gained 10 pounds in a weekend). I'm not sure how to make a long-term career out of this. I could either be an actor and gain/lose weight for every role (British thirty-something, fedex employee stranded on an island, etc) or I could look for competitions like the one we're having at my office right now.
Driving long distances - I think I have to thank my parents for this one. Lots of long road trips on their teacher vacations and my dad being a little stingy when it comes to springing for hotel rooms on successive nights. So, I think that means I'd make a really good truck driver, or take part in those super long road races. Unfortunately those probably require driving a stick (see blog on things I don't do well) and are only done in Europe to little fanfare.
Memorizing Mundane Facts about friends and colleagues - If there is ever a game show that requires contestants to remember things that are only impressive to the people that they are about, then I think I'd be a big winner.
After careful review, I've determined that I can't really make a career out of the things that I'm really good at. If anyone can think of careers that match my skills, please let me know. Until then, I'll just keep showing up for work.
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
The Secret World of Airport Employees
My Sweetest Blog,
It has been far too long since we have talked. That's probably my fault. Anyway, I have lots to tell the world. First, I've been spending more time at airports. Not just for the hell of it, but because I've been traveling (work, wedding season, etc). Anyway, I've decided that Airport Employees (security people, food service employees, etc) and Airlines Employees (pilots, gate agents) have their own little universe. I sort of think that the life of an airlines/airport employee is what life would be like if we became a communist or police state. There are lots of steps toward supposed efficiency without much in the way of results. Whether it is the scheduled mass transportation (little parking shuttle), the line ropes to keep things moving in, the non-stop requests for documentation, or the overall uncomfortable feeling that all visitors (travelers) always feel. There are also other parallels, including the limited food options. It's sort of like the USSR. Correction, it's sort of like my western perception of the former USSR. People wait in long lines and then pay high prices for limited options.
One more thing about airports...has anyone ever made a cell phone call at an airport without telling the person on the other end of the phone that they were at the airport? I'm not really sure what that's all about. My guess is that people are still hanging on to the old days when air travel was something that people looked forward to, and was considered a luxury good. Gone are the days when middle-aged women wear their fur coats to take the pan am flight across the country, but I guess there is still some glamour in air travel. At least when you're talking to someone who isn't at the airport. Perhaps they forget that you're really just a guest in a communist mini country.
It has been far too long since we have talked. That's probably my fault. Anyway, I have lots to tell the world. First, I've been spending more time at airports. Not just for the hell of it, but because I've been traveling (work, wedding season, etc). Anyway, I've decided that Airport Employees (security people, food service employees, etc) and Airlines Employees (pilots, gate agents) have their own little universe. I sort of think that the life of an airlines/airport employee is what life would be like if we became a communist or police state. There are lots of steps toward supposed efficiency without much in the way of results. Whether it is the scheduled mass transportation (little parking shuttle), the line ropes to keep things moving in, the non-stop requests for documentation, or the overall uncomfortable feeling that all visitors (travelers) always feel. There are also other parallels, including the limited food options. It's sort of like the USSR. Correction, it's sort of like my western perception of the former USSR. People wait in long lines and then pay high prices for limited options.
One more thing about airports...has anyone ever made a cell phone call at an airport without telling the person on the other end of the phone that they were at the airport? I'm not really sure what that's all about. My guess is that people are still hanging on to the old days when air travel was something that people looked forward to, and was considered a luxury good. Gone are the days when middle-aged women wear their fur coats to take the pan am flight across the country, but I guess there is still some glamour in air travel. At least when you're talking to someone who isn't at the airport. Perhaps they forget that you're really just a guest in a communist mini country.
Monday, April 2, 2007
On Being Neighborly
Dearest Blog,
My wife and I have lived in our house for just about three years. We live in a cookie-cutter neighborhood where a drunk person might stumble into the wrong house. Despite the similarities in housing characteristics, we don't feel like we have a lot in common with our neighbors. They drive big trucks, watch TV in their garage, and treat Daytona Sunday as their sabboth. For those reasons (and many others) we haven't really made an effort to meet any of our neighbors. In three years, I've met my next door neighbor three times. I say that I've met him three times because we've had to introduce ourselves each time. I've considered looking at his mail just to get his first name again without asking for it. My parents and my inlaws think that we should be more neighborly. Maybe have cookouts and open houses and other things of the sort. Your neighbors might be great people if you get to know them, they say. I've always responded that they might be bad people and we're better not knowing them. Well, it turns out that I was right on that one. We were watching the 10:00 Indianapolis news on Saturday when our house and block was shown during the first segment. Even before the idle chit-chat about the colts, or the weather, or the governor. It turns out that the lady who lives three houses down decided that she should go crazy and shoot her boyfriend and kill their dog. No domestic dispute...just plain crazy. Now this couple was just about our age, didn't have any kids, and would've been a prime candidate for our parents' matchmaking skills. Had we become friends with this couple, I probably would've felt a lot worse about this whole shooting thing and our neighborhood's 15 minutes. Now, there's probably a moral to this blog post, but I'm not sure what that is. I don't think it means you should avoid human interaction. I don't even think it means that people just go crazy. I think the moral of the story is that sometimes you know whats best for you and your parents don't. Well, that's not even true, but the good news is that we didn't know much about the crazy lady, so instead of getting personally invested with their drama, it just makes for entertaining blog fodder.
My wife and I have lived in our house for just about three years. We live in a cookie-cutter neighborhood where a drunk person might stumble into the wrong house. Despite the similarities in housing characteristics, we don't feel like we have a lot in common with our neighbors. They drive big trucks, watch TV in their garage, and treat Daytona Sunday as their sabboth. For those reasons (and many others) we haven't really made an effort to meet any of our neighbors. In three years, I've met my next door neighbor three times. I say that I've met him three times because we've had to introduce ourselves each time. I've considered looking at his mail just to get his first name again without asking for it. My parents and my inlaws think that we should be more neighborly. Maybe have cookouts and open houses and other things of the sort. Your neighbors might be great people if you get to know them, they say. I've always responded that they might be bad people and we're better not knowing them. Well, it turns out that I was right on that one. We were watching the 10:00 Indianapolis news on Saturday when our house and block was shown during the first segment. Even before the idle chit-chat about the colts, or the weather, or the governor. It turns out that the lady who lives three houses down decided that she should go crazy and shoot her boyfriend and kill their dog. No domestic dispute...just plain crazy. Now this couple was just about our age, didn't have any kids, and would've been a prime candidate for our parents' matchmaking skills. Had we become friends with this couple, I probably would've felt a lot worse about this whole shooting thing and our neighborhood's 15 minutes. Now, there's probably a moral to this blog post, but I'm not sure what that is. I don't think it means you should avoid human interaction. I don't even think it means that people just go crazy. I think the moral of the story is that sometimes you know whats best for you and your parents don't. Well, that's not even true, but the good news is that we didn't know much about the crazy lady, so instead of getting personally invested with their drama, it just makes for entertaining blog fodder.
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
It's the holiday season
Dear Blog,
It has been far too long since we have spoken. Blame it on schoolwork, march madness, or just general laziness. I like to think that the last few posts have been so revolutionary that I just didn't want to dilute the hair sponge blog brand by writing a lame post...trying to avoid the Godfather III of blog posts, I guess. Anyway, back to the blogging. I was discussing favorite holidays with a few of my coworkers last week. It was St. Patricks Day and there were a bunch of Bennigan's-type Irish people drinking green beer at a local bar. Votes were cast for 4th of July, Labor Day, and Thanksgiving. I voted for 4th of July because it is the one holiday where your life feels like you're at Cheers. Everyone is your friend...you get invited to parties by people that you don't even really know or care for. Something about grilled meat, cheap beer, overt patriotism and chineese pyrotechnics that bring us all together. Everyone gets a day off of work, and the weather is usually pretty decent (check local listings). Another top contender is Thanksgiving. I like Thanksgiving because it is like groundhog day (the movie, not the half-holiday). I don't know where I'll be working a year from now or even what city we'll be living in, but I could pretty much tell you what I'll do for Thanksgiving 2011. There are traditions that I enjoy (running the turkey trot w/my dad, watching the Skins game) and there are other traditions that I seem to participate just because they are traditions (shopping at the asscrack of dawn, watching that lame Nicolas Cage movie). Whether I like them or not, these are family traditions, and they put Thanksgiving in my top 3 holidays. So there you have it. Next time you hear me complain about neighborhood hillbillies lighting firecrackers that scare my dog, or about my glutunous behavior in late November, don't hesitate to reference this blog post, and remember that Nick Cage movies are the reason for the season.
It has been far too long since we have spoken. Blame it on schoolwork, march madness, or just general laziness. I like to think that the last few posts have been so revolutionary that I just didn't want to dilute the hair sponge blog brand by writing a lame post...trying to avoid the Godfather III of blog posts, I guess. Anyway, back to the blogging. I was discussing favorite holidays with a few of my coworkers last week. It was St. Patricks Day and there were a bunch of Bennigan's-type Irish people drinking green beer at a local bar. Votes were cast for 4th of July, Labor Day, and Thanksgiving. I voted for 4th of July because it is the one holiday where your life feels like you're at Cheers. Everyone is your friend...you get invited to parties by people that you don't even really know or care for. Something about grilled meat, cheap beer, overt patriotism and chineese pyrotechnics that bring us all together. Everyone gets a day off of work, and the weather is usually pretty decent (check local listings). Another top contender is Thanksgiving. I like Thanksgiving because it is like groundhog day (the movie, not the half-holiday). I don't know where I'll be working a year from now or even what city we'll be living in, but I could pretty much tell you what I'll do for Thanksgiving 2011. There are traditions that I enjoy (running the turkey trot w/my dad, watching the Skins game) and there are other traditions that I seem to participate just because they are traditions (shopping at the asscrack of dawn, watching that lame Nicolas Cage movie). Whether I like them or not, these are family traditions, and they put Thanksgiving in my top 3 holidays. So there you have it. Next time you hear me complain about neighborhood hillbillies lighting firecrackers that scare my dog, or about my glutunous behavior in late November, don't hesitate to reference this blog post, and remember that Nick Cage movies are the reason for the season.
Thursday, February 15, 2007
Gin & ____?
My latest quest has involved me mixing Gin with just about any liquid that I can find at my house or in the grocery store. I'm not sure where this thought came from, but for some reason I'm convinced that there is a better mixer for Gin than Tonic Water. It's not that I don't like the classic Gin & tonic...quite the opposite. I think it's a great drink. It's sophisticated enough to be ordered when you're with your boss, but not pretentious enough (see: scotch et. al) to be mocked by your peers. In addition to these great attributes, the Gin & Tonic also has a great taste. That being said, I feel as if someone created the Gin/Tonic combo and pretty much thought they had it figured out. That's the best we can do...we quit. I'm not convinced. What if we would've quit creating soft drinks after coke and pepsi? What if TV creativity stopped with three networks and a manual knob? If that was the case, how could I spend my evening drinking Berries & Cream Dr. Pepper while watching some southern lady bake some food I can't even pronounce on channel 56? So back to my quest. I've tried just about everything. Part of me thinks that my discovery will be like vasaline or the post-it note...that is, I'll find my perfect mixer while not even looking for it. If you have any ideas, please post comments. Keep in mind that I've already tried everything from: squirt, orange juice, dt. mountain dew, fresca (not proud of that one), beer, chocolate silk soy milk, apple juice, seltzer water, propel, lemonade...
Monday, February 12, 2007
Why am I blogging?
I'm not exactly sure. Sorry, I thought I could come up with a better reason than that. There's really no good reason for me to be doing this. I'm not entirely creative. I don't need a new outlet. I'm not bored. Well, sometimes I'm bored, but no more than usual. Not blogging to cure cancer or for world peace. I did hear a story about some girl who makes a bunch of money with her blog, but even with advanced economics training, I really don't understand how that works.
I guess I'm blogging for the same reason why I watch MTV from time to time...which is also the same reason why I think the 40 year old woman at my work wears a jean jacket and high boots. We all wish that we were younger. Blogging is the one way that I think I can hold onto my youth. I've tried other things. I worked at a college for a couple of years, which actually made me feel older. I've tried listening to young people music and it confuses me. I can't drink like I used to, and going to bars really just makes me want to stay home.
So there you have it. Blogging is something that my generation missed out on, and I want it back, dammit. You can keep your Chris Brown and MySpace and your juicy sweatpants, but I reserve the right to write about random things to nobody in particular. Now I feel like a kid again.
I guess I'm blogging for the same reason why I watch MTV from time to time...which is also the same reason why I think the 40 year old woman at my work wears a jean jacket and high boots. We all wish that we were younger. Blogging is the one way that I think I can hold onto my youth. I've tried other things. I worked at a college for a couple of years, which actually made me feel older. I've tried listening to young people music and it confuses me. I can't drink like I used to, and going to bars really just makes me want to stay home.
So there you have it. Blogging is something that my generation missed out on, and I want it back, dammit. You can keep your Chris Brown and MySpace and your juicy sweatpants, but I reserve the right to write about random things to nobody in particular. Now I feel like a kid again.
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